Failure is integral to our growing up. I am an epitome of digesting serial failures.
We will start at the very beginning, of this lifetime.
I hated to go to school, my father had to put books behind his back and deceive me to take to school. I had a strange fear to the teachers and the bullies from early on in life. I had a headstart in failures in grades. Until the 2nd grades my report cards only had RED marks against all subjects.
A change of place brought some relief but there the English language was a barrier. Shankar, who would go on to become a good friend in coming days, asked me “How are you?” and I could only respond with a blank look with sheepish grin. That grin remained for a long time. I started to pass from 3rd grade onwards. Then I managed to be in top 5 of my sections in later grades.
The storm of board exams shook me off ground, the waves of competition exam helped me lose a year in my education. By great determination I could get a decent rank in my 2nd attempt after 12th standard.
In college the only trait I carried was sincerity. Ragging had sucked the life out of me. My notes were used by my peers to score more percentage than me. My marks hovered around 64%. All the 4 years my weight in kgs and my percentage were same.
In final year of engineering I flunked in every campus placement interview except the last. Everybody started their career but my company delayed calling us by 6 months.
Once career started I was spending more time exploring interview venues than on the job. I got H1B visa from an agency in New York but then Y2K happened and I had to find another job.
Post several job hops I settled in freelancing hoping to be an entrepreneur but the social structure brought me back into the job space.
I am still trying to figuring out the delays in my student life, career life, personal life, social life. The hesitation and insecurities continues.
But life goes on.
Even though I don’t know why I studied what I did, am in a career which I don’t understand, there is progress. A movement is happening in some front. At least that is how it seems to me.
I would encourage you to also go through failure, hopefully learn from it. Success and failure are only a small part of this BIG thing called life.
Keep living it.
Be ALIVE.
Life is way beyond our little failures and successes. understand life.
unstuck your minds from self-pity जीवन मैं दैन्य और नीरस होकर कुछ नहीं होगा, कुछ भी हो अपना विस्वास और उत्साह बनाए रखो।
Initially my devotion was for the unseen nature and now it’s towards my Master. Sincerity and devotion have carried me so far. Meditation has helped to go beyond the mundane, the routine.
Find your master, find your drive, find your mission, life is much bigger than your failures. Go!! Live It.
